Officially closed

As i have passed out from medical college, this blog is officially closed.

Malady to melody

I am posted in labor room for the time being. Although I have assisted more than 50 deliveries during my student life, I haven’t conducted one. My chance to do one came two days back.

I was in charge of her. Let’s call her Rose. So I was monitoring Rose for more than 4 hours. Her belly is enlarged, as if she had swallowed a large water melon and obviously she is in distress. She cries out with pain when the contractions come. When she cries out I go near her and examines her vagina for signs of impeding delivery. After sometime her screams reached a crescendo, baby’s head was stretching her vagina. We shifted her to the stage II room, where we conduct delivery.

She was still screaming. Although she had been given an enema earlier to evacuate her bowels, she passed little bit of stool. I was chosen to conduct the labor. I was bit nervous, the senior PG was nearby. Anyway I can’t show that to Rose, so I put up a confident face and asked her to move down on the cot.

I gave her an injection of local anesthesia near her vagina and put an incision over that area (episiotomy). She was in great pain. We asked her to strain more. Yep, the baby came out. It’s a boy and he cried immediately. In a moment Rose’s pain was gone and she smiled, tears came down her face. After cutting the umbilical cord, we brought the baby to her. Rose kissed her child and we all smiled.

It was a great relief. So my first labor had a happy ending.
After seeing all the struggles though which a women goes in the process of giving birth to a child, my respect to my mother increased.

I salute all mothers.

Cupid in cardiology

 “Dr, Rosamma is having a chest pain.” I got up from my bed, it was 3.20 am. I took my stethoscope and went to Rosamma’s ward. “Dr. I am having pain in my chest.”, Rosamma said. She had a valvular heart disease. I examined her and ordered an ECG, nothing could explain her pain. I gave her a pain killer and went back. She didn’t have any chest pain that night.
During the next day’s rounds, the senior doctor examined and commented that Rosamma is much better now. I was happy, I thought that Rosamma could be discharged soon.
On that day night Rosamma complained of severe weakness of her left arm. I examined her and couldn’t find anything wrong. I was wondeed, what her disease might be. Then the nurse came near me and told “Give her an injection of distilled water.” “But, she is having weakness of her left arm?”
The nurse took me to a corner ,“Dr. She suspects that she will be discharged tomorrow and she want to make sure that she stays in the hospital”
“But, why?”
“I will explain it later. Can I give her an injection of distilled water?”. I nooded
The nurse went near Rosamma and gave her the shot ,“That was a costly medicine. Doctor thinks that you are having some serious disease. Anyway this medicine will take care of your problem”
After 15 minutes, I visited Rosamma again,. She was perfectly normal, her weakness had vanished.
“What do you think of Rosamma?”, the nurse asked.
“She has a graceful appearance, even in her 60’s, she is having a radiant face. I have heard that she has been here in the cardiology ward for more than 2 years.”
“That’s exactly what I was trying to convey. Why is she staying here? Why is she not discharged? Everytime we discharge her, she comes back the next day and says that she is having a chest pain and we have to admit her”
“Doesn’t she have any relatives?”
“Of course she has. I have seen her son coming and begging her to come back to their home”
“Then why is she staying here?”
“Have you noticed an old nursing assistant in our ward”
“Ya, that fair old man, who makes tea for the professor”
“Right. Every morning he will make a cup of tea and will give it to Rosamma, that’s the first thing that he does in the morning. They talk a lot”
“What’s your point?”
“I guess they are in love”
“Isn’t he married?”
“Ofcourse, he is”
“Hmmm”
She won’t disturb me anymore in the night. She died yesterday. Today I saw the nursing assistant, sitting in front of the kettle. Was he crying?

Two condoms – catheter and the real one!

 When patient don’t pass urine, we insert a tube through the penis/urethra into the urinary bladder. This procedure has its risk i.e., it will increase the chance of getting an infection. So in patients who are prone for infections and who are passing urine involuntarily, we use condom catheter. Its a thick condom with a tube at its end. I hadn’t inserted a condom catheter till last week. Last week I was presented with the opportunity to insert one. Since I didn’t know the procedure, I asked one of the interns, who happened to be married female “Susan, do you know to insert a condom?”
Her face became red. “what the hell are you asking” look on her face. Then I showed her the condom catheter. “Man, I was shocked. I took it for a real condom. Any way I haven’t inserted a condom catheter yet.”
Well, I asked a post graduate and he demonstrated the procedure.
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Last Sunday, I attended a workshop on AIDS. The speaker was quite impressive. He was narrating different ways to ward off AIDS. He started discussing about the use of condom. Suddenly he took out a condom pack and asked one of the senior doctors to demonstrate the correct way to insert a condom. It was embarrassing for him. He didn’t come forward. “A doctor is not able to demonstrate the correct usage of condom to a medical crowd! How will he teach his patients about good sexual practices?”, I thought.
P.S. During olden days medicos were taught to blow the condom and check for any leak before usage. Well, one of the old professors did blow the condom when he was asked to demonstrate. Thanks for the technology, now a days condoms are electronically tested.

Dulcolax 2 HS

I was constipated for 2 days (not verbal constipation, the real one). I tried many things, eating bananas, fruits and food rich in fibers. Nothing happened. Ultimately I decided to go for some laxative drugs. I searched my memory for a good drug. Dulcolax seemed the oblivious choice because I have seen the effect of this drug on many patients. Confident, I went to the medical store and brought 2 dulcolax tablets. The prescription of dulcolax is like this – Tab Dulcolax 2 HS. This means you have to take 2 dulcolax tablets before bedtime. Armed with this knowledge I decided to take the tablets before going to bed. I was very much tired that day and fell asleep without taking the medicine. Incidentally I got up at 3.30 am and realized that, I haven’t taken the medicine. So I took dulcolax and gulped it along with a glass of water and went back to sleep.

The next morning, nothing happened, constipation persisted. “Now a days these drug companies use chalk powders instead of medicine”, I thought. As usual I went to wards and started taking pre rounds. After the rounds by senior faculty, I started to take blood samples from patents for investigations. After taking blood from the third patient, I felt abdominal discomfort. I dismissed it and went on to take samples from the fourth patient. The discomfort didn’t go away, it started waxing and waning. I went on to the fifth, my face became red and I started sweating. “Are, you ok doc?” “Ya, I am perfectly fine”. I poked in the syringe, man that hurts. It was 10.30 am. I left the wards and ran for my room. My clothes came of in a jiffy. Entered the toilet. Now I can aptly define the word “relief” and I can vouch that dulcolax ain’t chalk powder. It take 7 hours for dulcolax to act!